This blog is for couples who have been together for a while, maybe have a few kids and even a dog or a cat. ?It’s about how to recreate the intimacy that takes a back seat once all the love dust settles.

Let’s go back in time for a minute. ?Remember when you first met? ?Everything was so exciting? ?You couldn’t wait to spend time together and literally counted the minutes you were apart. ?And the sex? ?The sex was amazing! ?You felt like you’d met your soul mate.

And then all the sizzle started to fizzle. ?Not right away. ?Little by little, everyday life started to leak air out of the cozy little bubble the two of you had formed around yourselves.

And guys – you started thinking – I don’t think she loves me anymore. ?We’re lucky if we have sex once a week. ?And usually the gap is a lot wider than that.

Ladies, you’re thinking – is this man out of his mind? Every day I have to get up, feed the kids, feed the dog, let the dog out, make breakfast for everyone, get in the shower, get dressed, try to get the dog back in (and you know he’s not going to make it easy for you – he knows a work day when he sees one and the idea of sitting in the house all day when there are ?squirrels to chase just doesn’t cut it) and hit the road before the traffic starts to back up. ?All this in under an hour, and that’s just the morning schedule!

Sex is the last thing on her mind. ?And that’s the problem. ?She’s thinking about all the stuff she has to do so there’s no room for intimacy. ?None. Zip. ?It’s not that she doesn’t want to make time for making love. ?She has needs too. ?But her needs are always on the back burner because she’s so busy taking care of everything and everyone else.

So what’s a guy and gal to do? ?There is hope. Here’s a few simple things to get back on the love track:

• Guys: lend a helping hand. ?Don’t wait to be asked,?because she’s never going to do it unless she’s having a meltdown and starts yelling about how little you do around the house. What’s this got to do with sex? The less she has to do, the more likely she’ll have time for you.
• Ladies: ask for help. ?Men are not psychic. ?They don’t know what you want unless you tell them.
• Don’t be afraid to create new habits – like opening the lines of communication. ?Just because you get into a pattern, doesn’t mean you have to stay there. ?Create a space where you can talk to each other openly about what’s going on in your life without complaining or accusing. ?It might be awkward to start, but so are all new habits. ?Do it long enough and and it’ll be no big deal
• Take a supplement like Cortisol Calm by Pure Encapsulations. ?The main ingredient, ashwaganda, is known for increasing libido. ?Cortisol is a hormone that’s released during fight or flight. ?Everyday stress that never lets up keeps cortisol elevated so you never quite relax. ?Reducing stress is key if you want to rekindle your love life. ?Cortisol Calm taken with meals in the morning and at night will help alleviate daily stressors.

If you’d like to learn more about how to infuse new life into your partnership, give me a call. ?I’d be happy to talk with you. ?Be well.